Basic and fundamental principles around honest communication with inspiration from classical philosophies around ego-awareness and detachment. Campell helps the reader develop trust and confidence in themselves to communicate more authentically with awareness around control patterns that hinder vulnerable, deep and authentic connections from being developed. I found the self-assessment questions helpful as well as the end of chapter summaries, but the case studies were drawn out and I felt the book lacked depth and focus.
Getting Real was a book club selection under the theme of the month, congruency, or to be in agreement. Honest communication is an important topic and value for me that I'm consistently working on cultivating. Living authentically, also drew my curiosity to understand what their measure of authenticity is, as I feel it is a subjective term in some contexts.
"We communicate with the intent to control rather than with the intent to relate. But until we take a risk and share authentically, nothing real can happen." — Susan Campbell Ph.D.
"It seems that the more you try to get reality to fit within your comfort zone, the more unprepared you are to deal with a world full of surprise, complexity, and change. Likewise, if we persist in trying to get our relationships to conform to our expectations instead of letting them be how they actually are, we may miss important opportunities to know ourselves and others more deeply." — Susan Campbell Ph.D.
"Automatically responding to your worst internal fear is a common control pattern. Your buttons are pushed, and you react. This pattern keeps you in familiar emotional territory, where you don′t have to risk learning anything about yourself." — Susan Campbell Ph.D.
"After you say something, pause and take in the fact that the other is now receiving what you just said." — Susan Campbell Ph.D.